LIFE IS FICKLE 

Post 19 - April 25th 2023

Dean Holland rode Team Captain for our TRL Vic Husslers ownership group in the Adelaide Cup at Morphettville on March 15th

We all look at life from a different perspective and as a result we live accordingly. Life is clearly different things to different people.

For me, as I have mentioned a few times in my Lewy Body Dementia posts here on the JonnyG Remembers blog, I have had a very fortunate life. Looking back on my 68 years it is clear I dodged a bullet a few times but really, it has been a privileged time.

With this LBD journey I have often sat back and reflected on how awkward life will become as the progression of my illness starts to bite. I am not in a bad spot at this minute, in fact things are as ok as can be but I know how this journey will end. And that is really sad.

I do also know I am not sitting here feeling sorry for myself, far from it.

However, with that said, this journey is still a massive bummer medically, it is very draining and can be a tough challenge. And then of course mentally it becomes another type of challenge, it is impossible not to be super reflective in thought and emotion.

But really, I am a very lucky lad, I have had all those years of living and I could still be here in sound mind for a while yet.

Yesterday afternoon, I was reminded of how fickle life could actually be.

Dean Holland, a 34-year-old father of four kids under 5 years of age was a jockey in the horse racing industry and had been for 18 years.

But in a tragedy, he was killed in a horse race at Donald.

Dean had his whole life ahead of him as a jockey, son, dad, mate and anything else he wished to be. But in a split second he was killed when the horse he was riding fell and another horse crashed over the top of him, he was crushed under the fallen animal. In an instant he was gone, he died under the running rail and that was it for Dean Holland.

So, being reflective I am understanding how lucky in life I am. I get to go on, I get to have some more good adventures before my time is up.

Yeah, it is all about perspective.

For Dean who had ridden over 1100 race winners, yesterday was just another day at the races as he was legged aboard that horse for the first race at Donald. On the home turn he was challenging the leader and looked a good winning chance and then the tragic fall and he was gone.

He cannot have his life back. But for me, while I have an awkward future I am still here in the present.

Meaning I need to be thankful for what I still have, when I am having tough moments, I really need to think about perspective by understanding 'tough' is a moment in time, death is forever.

Unfortunately, Dean is gone.

In his short life he was known to many of us in the racing game. He rode is all states around this great country at feature meetings, but Dean was a regular at Victorian country tracks. He travelled far and wide in this state taking mounts at meetings big and small because he loved showcasing country racing.

Recently he rode our horse Team Captain in the Adelaide Cup at Morphettville and as he always did Dean was very obliging in allowing our TRL Vic Husslers ownership group to share the moment with him. He took time for photo opportunities, to chat and engage us in the pre and post-race fanfare that goes with a race like this.

Then at a Warrnambool meeting at the end of March Dean had a chat before his riding commitments that day, he even shared how much he was enjoying his time in the saddle. He chatted about the Adelaide Cup Day and how good he felt being back in his home state riding in a race that he has won twice. It was a good catch up and I appreciated that he bothered to make time on a busy day to share some racing banter.

And yes, we know that Dean was always smiling, always good for a laugh, always cheerful and endeared himself to those around him. He was loved by so many. His death has rocked the racing world and Dean is rightly being remembered as an absolute star and champion bloke.

But he was taken from us. His family, his wife and kids, his mates, his industry peers are left to mourn this delightful young man who meant so much to this great industry.

So, as I push ahead on my LBD journey and encounter tough times, I can look at life and understand how lucky I am and then look at how unfair life was to Dean. 

Perspective.

Yep, I can and will draw strength from the tragedy of yesterday and understand I got to be lucky in life and Dean was taken far too soon.

Sadly, you are gone my little mate, but your star will continue to burn for so many and knowing that is a big thing for me personally going forward on this journey. 

I get a chance and I will now treasure that chance more than ever.

Dean Holland, rest in peace.